Monday, February 5, 2007

Pay Attention To Me

There's nothing that I hate more than customers who demand your full attention and time and act like small children if you don't spend every waking second with them.  They expect to be treated like they're the most important people alive.  News flash:  I'll be more willing to help you if you don't act like a two-year-old.  If you can't handle that, I'll find someone else to help you.  I'm sure I can find a lap dog somewhere.

I had one such customer on Friday afternoon.  Olga and Sue were on lunch, and Jay had left for the day, so I was on my own momentarily.  Luckily, it wasn't busy.  I decided to finish some things at the desk before I headed to the floor to clean things up and help customers, if need be.  After a few minutes, a man walked over.  He was a little grey and scruffy, wearing a baseball cap and was most likely in his 50's, and I could tell right from the beginning that something wasn't right.  He just stood there and stared at me with the creepiest look I've seen in a long time.
"Hi, can I help you with anything," I asked.
He just stared at me for a couple seconds...literally.
I stood up, and he finally answered.
"I have a question about your gliders," he said.
"Ok, what did you want to know?"
Again, he just stares.  Now he's starting to creep me out even more.  What's wrong with this guy?  I feel like I'm talking through a satellite, and there's a time delay.
"Is what you have out on the floor what you have?"
"Yes, it is, but some of them come in different colors of wood."
Insert continuous staring here.
"Do they come with the ottomans?"
"Some do.  If they do, on the tag it'll say, 'Glider with Ottoman.'  If not, then it's separate."
And more creepy, drawn-out staring...
"Do they come assembled or disassembled?"
"They come in a box disassembled."
I don't think it's necessary to type this anymore.  You know what goes here.
He looks aggravated for some reason.  "Well, what do the pieces look like?"
Geez, dude, it's a glider rocker.  "They come in about 5 pieces, I believe.  They don't take long to put together."
...*sigh*
"Ok," he replied, and he slowly turned, still giving me that you'd-better-watch-your-back stare as he walked away from the desk.  Did I warrant this in some way?  Ok, whatever, dude.

Almost a half hour went by, and by that time, Olga and Sue had returned, so I told them about the guy.  Olga replied, "Is that same guy in glider on cell phone?"  She pointed about 50 feet down the floor, and all I could see was the back of the glider rocking.  I said, "I don't think so.  I think he left already."
No sooner had that come out of my mouth than he got up from the glider and started walking towards the desk.  Damn it.
He looked directly at me.  "I'm interested in one of your gliders."
I began walking towards him a little as I asked, "Ok, which one were you looking at?"
He shot back, "Well, are you gonna come with me so I can show you?!?  I'm not just gonna tell you!"
"Yes, that's what I was about to do," I calmly replied.
I began following behind him, as I shot a look towards Olga and Sue.  He turned around and remarked, "You know, you've been very little help!"
"I'm sorry to hear that."  A**hole...
"Well, I'm gonna be truthfully honest, you couldn't be bothered to help me and show me the gliders."
I didn't even bother to reply.  I apologize for not holding your hand around the sales floor, sir.  I'm just curious:  Are you still being breast-fed?  Shall I hand you a pacifier to ease the whining and boo-hooing?

I think I ended up redeeming myself towards the end of that.  I was nothing but overly nice to him (as hard as that was).  The glider he wanted, we only had the floor model left, but he said he would buy it.  There was also a bassinet that he wanted.  However, he wanted to pick both up at the same time when he brought a bigger vehicle.  He didn't ask to put either on hold, and I wasn't about to offer.  Let's end this association as soon as possible.  Although, in retrospect, a name would have been nice to add to Danny McGrath's hit list (i.e. Billy Madison).

On Saturday, however, Olga sold the glider that he was looking at...to someone else.  She tried to assure me by saying, "I save you from guy."  I think I'm only halfway in agreement with that.  Let's just hope he doesn't come in while I'm working looking for that glider or we'll have WWIII ensuing.  I have three more work days to get through before I have a couple days off.  Thursday couldn't come sooner...

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